Have you ever thought to yourself “I don’t deserve to eat?”
You might think you don’t deserve to eat because:
- You feel your body isn’t worthy off food
- A traumatic experience has made you feel worthless
- You feel you haven’t earned food
- You’re punishing yourself
No matter what your body looks like or what you have experienced in the past, you deserve to eat.
Eating is the sustenance that gives you the fuel so that you are able to give your gifts and talents back to the world.
This article explores some why you might feel like you don’t deserve to eat and strategies to help you to eat and change your mindset around food.
What is It called When You Feel Like You Don’t Deserve To Eat
Feeling like you are unworthy of food can stem from one or many psychological conditions.
Some of the most common reasons you might feel you are unworthy of food include:
- Anxiety disorders
- Depression
- Eating disorders
- Past trauma
- Body dysmorphia
- Abuse
Eating disorders often co-occur with many of the other triggers for feeling like you don’t deserve to eat above.
Feeling like you don’t deserve to eat is often something your eating disorder voice will tell you to continue to keep you sick.
Why Do I feel Like I don’t Deserve To Eat
You Live in A Fat Body
Fatphobia keeps people in fat bodies feeling like they are not good enough. If you live in a fat body, you might feel like you don’t deserve to eat because of the messages from society.
If you live in a fat body you might feel like:
- You should eat as little as possible so you can lose weight
- People will think your lazy and glutenous if you eat
- You’re fat because you eat too much food
- Eating less food will make you healthier
- You should only be allowed to eat certain types of foods
While not a single one of these messages is true, our weight centric world will pressure you into thinking you need to be on a diet at all times. This can make you feel like you don’t deserve food unless you are in the thinnest body possible.
You Have Past Trauma
Trauma can have a big impact on whether you perceive yourself as being someone worthy of self care.
Not only can trauma make you feel unworthy, it can also cause you to feel disconnected from your body. You may not even experience appropriate hunger and fullness cues.
Types of trauma that might make you feel unworthy of food include:
- Death of a loved one and/or survivors guilt
- Abuse
- Sexual assault
- Alcohol or drug abuse
- Criminal history
Having experienced some of these traumas may leave you feeling out of control, hopeless, and unworthy of pleasure. Eating disorders often come in the form of the desire to maintain control if your world feels like it is spinning out of control.
Fighting against the urge to restrict your food is the first step in helping yourself heal emotionally and physically from unresolved trauma.
You Feel Like Food Needs To Be Earned
There are messages all around us that tell us that food is to be used as fuel, nothing more.
You might feel like you need to earn your food when:
- You don’t feel you burned enough calories for the day
- You feel a compulsion to exercise off your food
- You feel you didn’t do anything that deserves a “reward”
- You ate too many “bad foods” today already
- You feel like you ate too many calories yesterday
You Compare Yourself To Others
Comparing your body or what you eat to other people is called body checking.
You might compare your meals and snacks to other if:
- Someone else has lost weight by eating less
- You perceive people in small bodies eat less than you
- You are comparing what and how much you eat to someone else
- You see that thin people are treated better than you
- You see people in fat bodies and have a fear of gaining weight
You Deserve to eat
You deserve to eat, even if you don’t feel like you do. Here’s a few things you can do if you feel like you don’t deserve to eat.
When Do Feel Like You Deserve To Do
Even if you feel anxious, unworthy, and unloveable there is a good chance that there are some positive things you grant yourself permission to experience.
To help grant yourself permission to eat, make a list of where you allow yourself permission to experience pleasure. Then write down 3-5 reasons as to why you feel you deserve these things.
You might feel like you deserve to:
- Brush your teeth
- Shower
- Have access to housing
- Buy new clothes
- Experience sexual pleasure
- Watch television
- Have access to healthcare
- Drive a car
- Raise your children
All of these things are a form of self care. Try taking the reasons you have outlined as to why you deserve these forms of self care and applying them to eating.
Who Does Deserve To Eat
If you feel like you don’t deserve to eat, ask yourself who does deserve to eat and why.
Some reasons people deserve to eat include:
- They contribute something positive to society
- They are unique
- They are kind
- They are human
People do not deserve to eat more because they live in thin bodies, you perceive them as healthy, or they have achieved some level of success.
People deserve to eat because they are human. You are human, and you deserve to eat simply because you exist.
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